📜 A STATEMENT FROM THE ARCADE COMMITTEE
After five weeks of rigorous competition, 298 recorded runs, and one 9999 that remains "under investigation", the Committee is pleased to announce that Season 1 has concluded and nobody was fired.
- Nico wins the season by 23 points. He also reported a security hole in our PIN system, was rewarded with a credit, and then used that momentum to win the finale. The Committee has reviewed this sequence of events and finds it legally airtight and emotionally devastating.
- Henrique won two weeks in a row, found a bug, got paid for it, and still finished second. Second place comes with $50 and a lifetime supply of "what if".
- Jared opened the season with a crown and closed it on the podium, a model of consistency the Committee intends to study closely and then ignore.
- Greg finished fourth, which the Committee has confirmed is the exact position where the prize money stops. We checked twice. We're sorry. We're not that sorry.
- DINI's 9999 stays on the board as a monument to ambition. The investigation will conclude the moment he replays it live.
- Viktor, our house bot, scored 1705, filed zero complaints and requested no bounty. Employee of the Season.
- To everyone who finished with two unused credits: the couch remains undefeated.
Prize money will be distributed with the solemnity it deserves, which is to say in Slack, with emojis.
— THE ARCADE COMMITTEE · NEVER BLINKS · OCCASIONALLY SQUINTS
SEASON 2 — COMING SOON
Two-player and Team Play have been approved in principle, by which we mean someone said "cool" in Slack. New games. New roasts. Same honor system. Probably.
LOADING… THE COMMITTEE IS REVIEWING THE FOOTAGE